Why, Christmas, Why?

How many times have you been to the grocery store this week? I think I've been four times, and will likely go rushing out on Christmas Eve for some essential ingredient that I always forget. Why do I rush around like a crazy person, as if the entire holiday depends upon me keeping it together? I would love to be able to sit back and enjoy, but let's face it. Once you're no longer under the protection of your own Crazy Christmas Mom, it's all up to you. Unless you're a man.

Sick and Tired

Unfortunately, it's true. The Little Guy and I are nursing colds whilst the Big Guy laughs a big, healthy laugh in our snot-filled faces. And then goes to work, so the joke's on him. But really, why is the kid always sick lately? And why does he share?

So tonight is a quickie dinner. If you have not discovered the delight that is a Target rotisserie chicken, go get one now. They're a steal at $4.99 and they make my sick, lazy heart smile. Sam's has them, too, but Target is more convenient and equally tasty. And I have two leftover biscuits that I made two nights ago. Carb score! So all I have to do tonight is pop a dish of baby carrots in the microwave and finito. Dinner is served.

If you don't use the microwave to cook veggies, you definitely should. I don't even own a steamer. The microwave does the same thing, people. I mainly use it for broccoli, carrots, and cauliflower. Throw them in a microwave safe dish, add about an inch of water, cover and cook for about 7 - 8 minutes depending on your wattage and how crispy you want them.

P.S. For those of you who enjoyed the clean tub tip, here's a similar chemical-free shortcut for your counters. Sprinkle some baking soda on them, cut a lemon and squeeze the juice on there. Use the cut lemon to scrub your troubles away.

Produce War and Chemical Injury, All in a Day's Work

The Little Guy has declared war. His weapon of choice, whatever vegetable is within reach. My usually exemplary grocery shopper has become a jicama hurler. Say it the Spanish way and you'll get the alliteration.

What should have been an uneventful trip to the produce market turned into a fight for survival. Unsuspectingly, I pushed my shopping cart and boy ensemble to the zipper peas, and no sooner do I stop to procure said peas when I see my pint-sized adversary grab a fistful of okra and begin to chomp. Fantastic. How do you explain to a toddler that not all vegetables should go directly in the mouth? His next act of violence was to palm a carton of cherry tomatoes and send them hurtling to the ground. "Why, God, why," they seemed to cry as they were crushed by other shopping carts. My son, the tomato killer. But tomatocide aside, I have to admire his spirit and love of vegetables, if not his misplaced fervor.

On a different subject, I cleaned the tub today and thought you people should know about it. Am I the only one that sneaks a peek into other people's tubs to see how clean they are? I'm always satisfied by a job half done; a clean bathroom and a so-so tub. It's a clean that says, I am busy and don't have all day to do this, so I wiped down the sink and toilet, You're not bathing here, so what do you care. I absolutely love that because that so describes me. Just know that if I come to your house and use your bathroom, I will look at your tub, but I won't judge.

So the real point of this is that I've found the cheapest way to get the tub its cleanest. Take a little baking soda, about 3/4 cup or so, and few shakes of salt, mix it with a little water until it's pasty, grab a brush and scrub your heart out. It works so well. I used to use Greased Lightning, which I still think is great, but this works just as well, is cheaper, and keeps chemicals out of the tub so you don't have to worry about not getting it all out of there. I always worried about that. Nobody wants to have to go to the doctor and tell them you chemically injured your parts by sitting in a tub of Greased Lightning. Or is that just me?

Scenes From a Kitchen: No Cook Mexican

So apparently my husband has been replaced with a health-conscious alien. Today is is birthday (happy birthday, Big Guy) and I guess it hit home that he's not as young as he used to be. During dinner a few days ago, he nonchalantly stated that we shouldn't eat so much meat (or meat-a according to Little Guy). I nearly choked.

You see, my husband is a big time crappy food lover. His loves include, but are not limited to, pizza, burgers, fries, soft drinks, crap, crap, and more crap, but these foods are directly at odds with his love of cycling. I'm assuming cycling has finally won, because the Big Guy wants to go Mediterranean, which means less meat, more veggies and low fat proteins. I almost cried. How long have I waited for this day? I've slowly been introducing meatless meals, fresh herbs, new veggies, etc. for months and he's eaten pretty much everything without complaining, but now he's finally on board. Bazinga.

So this was my answer for dinner last night. I call it authentic white people Mexican, or the constipation reliever. Take your pick.

Black Bean, Tomato, and Avocado Salad

1 can rinsed black beans

1 large tomato chopped

2 Haas avocados chopped

1/3 cup chopped cilantro

1/4 cup lime juice

salt and pepper

Mix together and serve

And that stuff was good. We had it with brown rice, mangoes, and fried bananas, and there were no leftovers. Enjoy!

Skillet Eggplant

I finally found a way that I like eggplant, and I am relieved. I thought I'd have to cook eggplant for one forever since the Little Guy likes it so much, but now I have avoided that fate.

Here's what I did:

Peel one small eggplant and cut into tiny finger sized pieces

Cut up half of a tomato

Throw in skillet with a little olive oil and cook until mushyish

Add a little pasta sauce just until coated, but not soupy, about 1/8 jar

Tear up two bail leaves and add to skillet

Throw in a few handfuls of feta cheese

And it was great. Try it.

Coupon Alert

Yes, I know. I've been slacking. But I found a coupon that inspired me to blog. If you live in my area and drink coffee, pay attention. There's a coupon in either the Mint or MoneyPages, I can't remember which, for 4 lbs of Dunkin Donuts coffee for $19.99. You just have to go to a Dunkin store to buy it. For those like me who can barely do simple math, that comes out to $5 a pound, which is $2 - $3 cheaper than the grocery store per pound. Go get some.

Also, I found that Sam's Club has the world's greatest mangoes. They are amazing. And you can get six of them for about $5. Anything less than $1 a mango is an accomplishment, especially for good ones, and my kid will eat them every day without complaining. Another accomplishment.

I also have a gripe. I bought Purex free & clear detergent the other day because it's cheap and I had used it before. Apparently I'm big on repeating mistakes, because this detergent doesn't do jack crap. I would probably have better luck just showering with my clothes on, although that would make diaper laundry more complicated.

Grocery Plunder

Hi, All. Just wanted to let you know about the steak deal at Target...and to let you know that I bought them all, so there's no point in looking for them. Target's Sutton & Dodge brand (which is amazing) T-bone steaks have $3 off coupons stuck to them. So I got ginormous T-bones for a little over $5 a piece. If you haven't tried Sutton & Dodge yet, go find some on sale and buy it, because it is truly fantastic. Just not the T-bones because they're gone.

Also, if you wear contacts like me, here's a great deal. Bausch & Lomb has a new brand out called Bio-something. I've never tried it, but I will because there's a coupon on Coupons.com for $2 off AND there's a coupon from Target for another $2 off, AND it's on sale a Target right now for about $8.50, ergo I bought the solution for $4.50. Sorry I'm not technical enough to include hyperlinks. I fail.

And my great triumph of the week is that I came in $10 under budget at the grocery store even after the meat that I didn't plan on buying. If you don't check Coupons.com, you definitely should. They're coupons are often quite hefty. Also, after checking circulars, Target was definitely the place to go.

30 Minutes to Dinner: What Misguided Act of Domesticity Will You Attempt?

It seems that pasta is an art, and like most forms of art, a certain amount of skill and preparation are required. I was running low on noodles, so I figured, hey, how hard can it be to make noodles? The website I found said it was relatively simple. They recommended a pasta sheeter, but said a rolling pin would also work. Ta da! I have a rolling pin collecting dust in the pantry. I can do this! Little did I know.

Picture in your mind a funnel cake. Now put your hands in that funnel cake and break it all to pieces. Now throw those pieces in boiling water and you have a perfect picture of what my noodles looked like. Not pretty, is it? Needless to say, we didn't eat them. I found a half empty box of farfalle in the back of the fridge that saved dinner.

The moral of the story: pasta making is not for the faint of heart or for just any old house frau with a rolling pin.

Get Your Veggies on the Cheap

I neglected to post last week, and somehow Publix knew that. They are continuing their 99 cent sale on zuchini, squash, green beans, and okra through this next week just so I would have a chance to blog about it. Maybe Publix isn't so bad after all.

But you may want to also head to Target if you're of the berry-eating persuasion. They have been so kind as to put their Driscolls on sale for 1.99 for a decent sized carton of blueberries, strawberries, and raspberries.

A recent discovery, the lost art of roasting a chicken. Well, it was lost to me. You can buy a whole chicken for way cheaper than you can buy the white meat. And the instructions are written on the bag, which takes all the mystery and excitement out of it, but you get a cooked bird so it's a fair trade. The next night I took the leftovers, or carcass as my grandmother would say, and made soup. So it was about two dinners and two lunches worth of food, and I got the pioneering satisfaction of using every last hunk of meat. Yay, cheap food!

Publix is Trying to Kill Me

Have you looked at the Publix circular this week? The Publix brand ice cream is 2/$5.00. This would be a good thing if I hadn't just bought the Breyers ice cream on the same sale last week. I am displeased. I love ice cream. But, in particular, I love Publix ice cream.

A few months ago, a stock boy, God love him, let me in on a little secret. Publix ice cream is actually made by Breyers. And I thought, well, that explains it. Breyers was my favey. And the Publix brand is just as good, only they have the most kicking ice cream flavors in the whole world, our personal standouts being Lemon Sugar Cookie and Blackberry Cobbler. I am told they also have the only peppermint candy flavor available all year.

Now I am presented with a conundrum. Do I eat my weight in the Breyers that I bought in hopes that we will run out before the end of the sale, or do I admit defeat and wait until next time. The fighter in me badly wants to plant myself in front of the TV and eat ice cream from the Today show through Leno, but alas, it is summer and I still have a few pounds of baby weight to lose. You win this one, Publix.

Scenes From a Kitchen

Oh, there are so many things I could write about today.

I just got wine in the mail. I know! It's fantastic! I used a Groupon and got $75 worth of wine for $28. I am so excited!

So anyway, the kitchen.

Meatless Mondays are still going strong. My plan for lentil burgers was shot down by - you guessed it - the Big Guy. So I did the only thing I knew to do, made macaroni and a truck load of veggies. I used the new Kraft Homestyle Macaroni or something like that. It wasn't bad, except to make it casserole style is a little involved and required me to use my own cheese. I would have felt slightly ripped off except I bought it with a coupon and got it for free.

The standout veggie was fresh okra that I steamed in the microwave with a half a can of stewed tomatoes. I love okra. Deeply.

However, what I don't love is my "I'm a Mom without a Brain" moment. I'm eating on the couch, minding my own business, when the pre-tot run-crawls over, pulls himself up and demands a bite of something, anything. So, idiot me, I fork him a tiny tomato. It's too hot and he spits it on the carpet. Nice. And then the Big Guy looks over at me with the "How do you survive without me all day" look and asks how to get the spot out. But I earned a little Mom-cred back when I knew how to get the spot out. The moral of the story is eat dinner at the table.

It's the End of the World, and I Helped

I have never been a person who enjoys Wal-Mart. If you do enjoy it, then you're just plain sick. Nothing says fun like waiting in line with the dregs of society trying not to make eye contact or contract an illness. Kind of like the line at the methadone clinic. One might say I hate Wal-Mart.

I also believe Wal-Mart is the downfall of the free market economy, capitalism at its worst. Goodbye, Mom and Pop shops of yesteryear, we got us a Wal-Mart. The only thing that can compete is another superstore, a better superstore, free of creepies and slightly more expensive. I love said superstore, for it is not Wal-Mart.

That having been said, I had to truck out to Wal-Mart for something or other yesterday and had to eat my words. I found tank tops for $3.50. The tank tops I had been wearing were left over from my preggo days and were way to big. So I got three new, seemingly well constructed tank tops for $3.50 a piece. And since at that point I was going to hell anyway, I bought a few pairs of shorts for $10 each. So if you need clothes and happen to find yourself in the armpit of the universe, stop and take a look.

Oatmeal and Other Life-Changers

An empty raisin box yesterday brought us to our knees. The Big Guy trucked himself to the grocery store and was phone-guided by yours truly over to the raisins and other recent life-changer, organic oatmeal. As it turns out, the generic brand organic oatmeal is still cheaper the conventional Quaker. And the Big Guy is sold.

Evidently, we all had an unknown love of oats. We will never buy instant oatmeal packets again. Organic oats cost about a buck a pound. We added raisins, cranberries, flax seeds, and a small squirt of maple syrup, and found an oh-so tasty and cheap, not to mention healthy, breakfast that is ready in 15 minutes. Score one for Mom.

Score another for Mom, the Big Guy ate tofu lasagna the other day and couldn't tell the difference. He was slightly cheesed after he found out, yet ate it willingly the next day, if not grudgingly. But I seriously had no idea I could buy organic Whole Foods brand tofu for a dollar. It turned out to be a win on all fronts.

Oh, Dear

So the Five Dollar Family is slowly becoming defunct. I know, I know. This doesn't mean we're not saving. It just means, well, math is hard. My brain is heaving in my skull at the thought of dividing everything my two people and then by four meals. I mean, if we just ate freezer meals, no sweat, but that's a rarity. But adding fresh ingredients and then figuring out the percentage that we used and how many meals we actually got out of it, not to mention pureeing the leftovers into food for the kid. I can't do it. My mental faculties are best spent elsewhere. Like deciding what I will buy myself for Mothers' Day and then write my son's name on a card.

So to console myself and my few faithful readers, I have enacted Meatless Mondays. Meatless Mondays are fun! Last Monday, we had a super beans and rice recipe I found at my new favorite blog, Food With Kid Appeal. http://foodwithkidappeal.blogspot.com/2009/11/super-food-on-budget-black-beans-rice.html.

And Wednesday was meatless also. We had an amazing chili dip with cream cheese as the base. It was uber yummy. Cream cheese, black beans, spiced tomatoes, and more cheese all layered together with blue corn chips. I highly recommend it.

So now we're trying to come up with a theme for every day of the week. I told my husband that Topless Tuesdays were a no-go.

Join the Five Dollar Family on a Food Revolution

Okay. Listen up!

I am encouraging you to take action, and action starts in the home, in particular my home. I have a proposition for everyone. The Big Guy and I want to start a Food Revolution dinner party. We really enjoy what Jamie Oliver is doing and want to get involved.

The Proposal:

We want to open up our home every other Saturday evening, say 5:30, to all our family and friends that want to participate. All you have to do is bring a HEALTHY covered dish and show up. We're trying to get new ideas for healthy meals that we can make at home so we won't resort to processed food just because it's cheap and easy. We are in a dinner rut, and I'm sure we're not the only ones. So bring your healthy dish, your ideas, yourselves and anyone else who needs a dinner boost.

The Response:

Please, please, PLEASE let me know if this is something you'd like try. Don't feel like you can't come just because you don't know me well. This is also a great opportunity for people to get to know each other. I'd like to schedule the first party for Saturday, May 1, but I need to know if anyone is interested. I will report a firm date and time depending on response volume.

LET ME KNOW IF YOU'RE WITH ME!

Dinner - $0

I spent nothing on dinner last night. We had leftover spaghetti from the in-laws that I froze and thawed, including the noodles. I wasn't aware you could do this, but my mother-in-law told me I could freeze the noodles and then dip them in boiling water to bring them back. They weren't quite as good as fresh noodles, but edible, especially after I put sauce on them. Our beverage was provided by my sister who left a bottle of Coke at my house. So totally free. I like it.

My deals this week were provided by Big Lots. If you've never been there, you should go. I found DeCecco organic fusilli for $1 a box. This is the brand used on Lydia's Italy, so I was very excited. I also found Panko breadcrumbs for $1.25. I haven't tried these yet, but my mom swears it's the best breading she's ever used. That's what's for dinner tonight along with acorn squash from the farmer's market, 2 for $1, and sautéed zucchini that I think I paid too much for, 3 big ones for $2. That makes dinner about $2.31 a serving, and makes me a success.

The Royal Order of the Mooch

Our daily totals over the weekend were great, or at least mine were. I think the big guy went over a little on Saturday because he didn't take a lunch to work. But the reason we did so well is because we didn't eat at home much; we ate at other people's houses. Saturday we ate with the in-laws and Sunday we ate corned beef with my family. I love corned beef.

The moral of the story is, if you eat at someone else's house, it costs you nothing.

I have not gotten the big guy's total for yesterday, but mine was $4.13. We had a super cheap and wonderful dinner last night. Here's the break-down:

Chicken leg quarters, BOGO at Winn-Dixie, roasted with citrus grill seasoning = $1.12 per quarter
Red potatoes, chopped and sauteed with rosemary and parsley = $.13 per serving
Head of broccoli, steamed and drizzled with Italian dressing = $.25 per serving

Grand total = $1.50 per serving

By the way, last week at the farmer's market, I bought the brocolli for $1.00. So if you're a broccoli-eater, that's the place to get it. But I think the deal of the day was on the herbs I bought. I got giant clumps of parsley, dill, and cilantro for $.50 each. The farmer's market is a magical place.

Day 1 or Epic Failure

Actually, we didn't do too badly. Here's a run-down of our costs per person:

.13 to make coffee
.20 instant oatmeal
.17 bananas, which was too much, but I needed them
.04 shampoo per day
2.75 quesadillas (1.75 for cheese, .10 for sour cream, .45 for beans, .30 for olives, .15 for tortillas)
.30 for most of the baby food

We drank water all day for the most part. I'm using a shower gel that I won at a baby shower, and David uses Dial that I got at Big Lots so cheap that it's less than a penny a day.

After our various snacks, the grand totals are

Me = $5.51
Big Chief = $8.19
Little Chief = $2.83

So the big guy is hemorrhaging money. Basically, it was my fault. I had an uber cheap lentil soup planned, but I let him talk me into quesadillas, which were great, but he needed two of them to feel satisfied. I have a feeling he's going to be my Achilles heel, as if he wasn't already.

Since we've already blown our totals for the day, I'm off to make cookies. If we eat them all, they won't count toward tomorrow's totals.

It's Almost Here

That's right, people. Tomorrow is April Fool's Day, otherwise known as the beginning of the Five Dollar Project, as I have affectionately termed it. And I don't mind telling you that I see a black cloud on the horizon. My grocery receipts are mocking me. I can feel it.

FYI - Winn-Dixie has chicken leg quarters on sale BOGO. The white meat is on sale, too, but it still comes out to over $2 a pound, which I can't justify. It's chicken. Honestly.

So we'll see how this whole thing goes. If you'll be participating with me, give me a shout.

Perhaps I Was Too Hasty

Hello, all. I'm going to amend my last post only slightly. Five dollars per person is more attainable than five dollars for the whole family. That's the figure I'm going with. Also, I'm going to itemize groceries not by what the total cost is, but according to how far it goes. For example, if I make a roast and it cost $10 but we got two meals out of it, then that's a $5 meal divided by two people, so the total per person would be $2.50. It's a good thing I have a graphing calculator.

Thanks to everyone who responded via Facebook with encouragement and ideas. Please keep them coming. I will be posting the things that work for me and the things that don't, i.e. shopping tips, recipes, store sales, etc., in case anyone wants to join in this project.

Our official first day will be April 1. Tell all your friends. Until then, happy social networking.

Good Morning, Economy

Somewhere between plucking my eyebrows and getting dressed, it occurred to me, I should devote more time to my eyebrows, and there's got to be a cheaper way to live.

My husband, D, and I have one car payment, hospital bills for the birth of E, student loans, credit card debt, and a reasonable house note. I don't know if that's a lot of debt comparatively, but it seems like a lot to me. Last year I read that Suze Ormond book about getting out of debt. Big surprize, you need to pay it and not incur more. What a shocker. That's great, Suze, but I can't cut back anymore. There's nothing to cut.

Here's a little about me. I'm a full-time mom with two part-time, home-based businesses. I have considered going back to work, but childcare is expensive and I didn't exactly make heaps of dough at my old job. I try to make up the difference by only filling up the tank once a month and being a whiz with the grocery budget. And yet, we struggle with these bills.

So here's my proposition: Starting next month, I'm only going to spend $5 a day. Gasp! This will not include bills, obviously, and I will itemize my grocery bill for you lovely people to show what I actually use every day and what I spent on it. And I will also note the ways I saved money. I am determined that this will work or at least come close to working. Here's to hoping!